Chronic abusers and habitual hypocrites often have an irrational hatred toward those who are truly godly and pure in heart. Why is this so? This excerpt from Hypocrisy Exposed explains how this works:
Chronic hypocrites have an irrational hatred for the pure in heart. This boils down to the fact that those with pure hearts represent everything that the hypocrite is not. True displays of worship and adoration to God are despised by ones who only have a phony shell of a relationship with the Lord. Compassion and love are inwardly scoffed at by ones who can only mimic such emotions and actions. Saul hated David. The Pharisees hated Jesus. Cain hated Abel. The hypocrite hates the pure in heart.
In this the children of God and the children of the devil are manifest: Whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is he who does not love his brother. For this is the message that you heard from the beginning, that we should love one another, not as Cain who was of the wicked one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his works were evil and his brother’s righteous. (1 John 3:10-12)
Cain’s evil heart was irritated by Abel’s purity and righteousness before God. This jealousy and hatred eventually turned into murder. The Pharisees’ jealousy and hatred of Jesus also turned into murder, although they didn’t realize that in condemning Him to death, they were playing into God’s plan for redemption and salvation. And we already looked at Saul’s attempts at trying to kill David in the previous chapter. Those who don’t have the real thing despise the ones who do.
Hypocrites don’t always murder people physically, but they have hatred in their hearts and often “murder” people with their mouths. “The hypocrite with his mouth destroys his neighbor” (Proverbs 11:9). “The words of the wicked lie in wait for blood” (Proverbs 12:6 ESV). Destructive words do violence to the soul. They are to the soul what weapons are to the body. In the Bible they are compared to swords, arrows, deadly poison, and scorching fire. Some people downplay the reality of verbal abuse or claim that it is not in the Bible. But I would say that according to the examples given in Scripture, verbal abuse is not a strong enough term. Murder through words or verbal assassination would be more appropriate!
Hypocrites hate the pure in heart, and this hatred often manifests through vile and hurtful words. Narcissistic abusers are known to constantly falsely accuse and spew word curses at their victim. They use words to belittle, degrade, and demean. They use deceptive and destructive words to deceive, control, manipulate, and intimidate. When a hypocrite is using destructive words against you, remember that the devil in them hates the Christ in you. There are spiritual powers at work and it is beyond a mere human conflict.
Hatred in the heart is a big deal to God. John goes on to expound upon this theme again in his letter: “If someone says, ‘I love God,’ and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen, how can he love God whom he has not seen?” (1 John 4:20). Saying “I love God” is easier than loving your brother or sister. Living out a love for God will include loving others. Some give lip service to loving God, which is serving as a cover to the hatred that is in their heart toward others.
Destructive words not only damage the soul, they can also release spiritual attack and demonic influence. I have seen this time and time again in ministering deliverance to people. If you have been afflicted with destructive words, the good news is that you can be healed and set free. Forgive the person who spoke the words and ask God to break the power of any curses that have been spoken over you. Renounce any lies of the enemy that you have believed or any way that you have come into agreement with the words spoken over you. Command any evil spirits that were released through the words to leave you in the name of Jesus. Give God thanks and praise for what He is doing and begin to declare the truth of His Word over your life!